We all planned on going to Cole's 7th birthday party today.
However, as most of our family is still sick, I decided to spare the Paul household (as well as party guests) a nasty cold and leave the sick ones home to recover on the couch.
So, off I went to party with the healthy 2 year old, thinking that I would have a nice afternoon with only 1 child.......hell, I may even actually get a chance to have adult conversations.
However, as most of our family is still sick, I decided to spare the Paul household (as well as party guests) a nasty cold and leave the sick ones home to recover on the couch.
So, off I went to party with the healthy 2 year old, thinking that I would have a nice afternoon with only 1 child.......hell, I may even actually get a chance to have adult conversations.
WRONG!
What was I thinking?!
Emmy is extremely attached to me and does not enjoy groups of people staring at her or trying to talk to her........she basically freaks.
She is fine if she is busy doing something in a group or if we are out in a public setting, as long as she is not the focal point of the group.
What was supposed to be a fun party was the exact environment that I know she hates.... all she could do was cry and repeat over and over that she wanted to go bye-byes.
I calmed her down, only for her to get all worked up again when some well intended, innocent person would try to talk to her.........or me.
So I basically carried my 30-somethingish pound child around the house, trying to avoid the party, yet wanting to join the party, not my idea of fun.
We stayed about 20 minutes before I had to leave.....for my own sanity as well as hers.
I like to think that I am in sync with my kids and although I set boundaries, I follow their cues and do not force my feelings on them, I want them to always trust me and know that I will listen to them.
Despite my connection to my kids, I still feel horrible for people around me when these situations come up.
I know that they are trying to help, and when my child's screams are basically telling them to F-off, I can't help but feel crappy about it.
Thankfully, most people I know understand that it is not personal, it is just the way my kids are.......I am the one riding the roller coater of emotions.
So, I left today feeling defeated because this is not the first party that I have had to sneak out of early with one of my emotional kids, and I am positive it won't be the last.
But that feeling was short lived because as we were walking to the car, Emmy hugged me tight around my neck and said "go bye-byes, Mama"........I told her yes and she looked at me and said "Mama kiss Emmy".....and I gave her a kiss.
What was I thinking?!
Emmy is extremely attached to me and does not enjoy groups of people staring at her or trying to talk to her........she basically freaks.
She is fine if she is busy doing something in a group or if we are out in a public setting, as long as she is not the focal point of the group.
What was supposed to be a fun party was the exact environment that I know she hates.... all she could do was cry and repeat over and over that she wanted to go bye-byes.
I calmed her down, only for her to get all worked up again when some well intended, innocent person would try to talk to her.........or me.
So I basically carried my 30-somethingish pound child around the house, trying to avoid the party, yet wanting to join the party, not my idea of fun.
We stayed about 20 minutes before I had to leave.....for my own sanity as well as hers.
I like to think that I am in sync with my kids and although I set boundaries, I follow their cues and do not force my feelings on them, I want them to always trust me and know that I will listen to them.
Despite my connection to my kids, I still feel horrible for people around me when these situations come up.
I know that they are trying to help, and when my child's screams are basically telling them to F-off, I can't help but feel crappy about it.
Thankfully, most people I know understand that it is not personal, it is just the way my kids are.......I am the one riding the roller coater of emotions.
So, I left today feeling defeated because this is not the first party that I have had to sneak out of early with one of my emotional kids, and I am positive it won't be the last.
But that feeling was short lived because as we were walking to the car, Emmy hugged me tight around my neck and said "go bye-byes, Mama"........I told her yes and she looked at me and said "Mama kiss Emmy".....and I gave her a kiss.
2 comments:
Oh you should NOT feel bad. You did what any good mother would do. Each of our children has their own personality and what they are comfortable with. I think its wrong to try to fight it. At this stage in our life, our kids are still trying to find their way and we have to work with them. I know its hard on you and you feel like your "giving in" and its hard not to think about what others think but you shouldn't. I am sure everyone at the party today has been through what happened today in some form or another- you made the absolute right choice by taking her out of an environment she was not comfortable with. I think what is wrong is when parents try to scold their kids for being nervous or whatever they are feeling...that's just sad. You didn't do that at all - you are in tune with her and you know what she wants. You are a good Mom and I agree with you 100% for taking her home.
Thank you!
Chris was surprised when we got home so early today.....I have to laugh at it because all of my kids are like this!
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